How to Stop Being a People Pleaser: 7 Powerful Habits

Eleanor Roosevelt“When you say “yes” to others, make sure you aren’t saying “no” to yourself.” Paulo CoehloWhen you get stuck in the habit of being a people pleaser then that can have a sneaky and negative effect.Not only on you but also on the people around you.Because as you try to please the other people in your life:So trying to please others pretty much all the time is often an even worse choice that one may at first think.But how can you change this behavior and stop being a people pleaser?This week I’d like to share 7 powerful insights and habits that have helped me with that.1.

Realize that with some people it isn’t about you and what you do (no matter what you do).Some people just can’t be pleased.

No matter what you do.Because it’s not about what you do or do not do. It’s about him or her.About how she’s having a bad month, a sick pet or doesn’t have a good chemistry with you.Or about him being in an unhappy marriage, in too much debt or having a tooth ache that just won’t stop.By realizing this and how you in the end can’t get everyone to like you or avoid conflict no matter what you do you can start to let go of this ineffective and damaging habit.2.

Learn how to say no.When you like to please then it’s of course hard to say no.But it is vital for you own happiness, stress-levels and for living the life you truly want.Here are 5 things that have made it easier for me to say no more often:Disarm and state your need.It’s easier for people to accept your no if you disarm them first.Do that by, for instance, saying that you’re flattered or that you appreciate the kind offer.Then add that you, for example, simply don’t have the time for doing what they want.If they’re pushy, add how you feel.Say that you don’t.