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Lessons from a Former Overthinker: How to Start Really Living

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tinybuddha.com

“Rule your mind, or it will rule you.” ~Buddha I used to be trapped in a , replaying past mistakes, worrying about the future, and mentally holding onto every thought, just as I physically held onto old clothes, books, and my child’s outgrown toys.

The fear of letting go—whether of physical items or persistent thoughts—felt overwhelming. But I didn’t realize that this habit of mental hoarding was keeping me stuck in place. The Anxiety of Letting GoMy Last Day of School One of my earliest experiences with mental hoarding happened on my last day of school in 1996 before my tenth-grade board exams.

When my class teacher wished us “All the very best, children, for your board exams,” I suddenly realized—it was my last day in school.

This thought had never crossed my mind before, and it hit me hard. I’d spent over a decade there—eleven or twelve years—growing up, laughing, learning, crying, sharing tiffins, and living through every moment with my friends.

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3 Things You Need to Stop Doing to Live a Simpler Life
“Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.”ConfuciusThis article is about a few mistakes I’ve made.About a few destructive habits that can make life quite messy and unhappy.And it’s about what you can do instead to replace those mistakes and habits with something better.This article is all about uncovering simplicity if you find yourself having overcomplicated your life.Few habits and mistakes are as common as getting stuck in overthinking.I used to do it all the time.And it led to a lot of analysis paralysis, to little action being taken on what I deep down wanted and to so much time and energy wasted.What to do instead:Set short deadlines.When you have all the time in the world to consider something then that can often wind up in you spending a lot of time thinking about the situation at hand from every conceivable angle.I have found that learning to set short deadlines is really helpful for this, although it take a bit to practice.So for small decisions like if should go and do the dishes or go and work out I usually give myself 30 seconds or less to make a decision.For somewhat larger decisions that in the past would have taken me days or weeks to think through I set a deadline for 30 minutes or for the end of the workday.Say stop in a situation where you know you can’t think straight.I know that I’m more vulnerable to negative thinking and overthinking things when I’m hungry or when I’m close to my bedtime.And so I have learned to stay away from thinking about anything important during that time.And if such thoughts with a negative twist still pop up then I tell myself: No, no, we’re not going to think about this now.Because I know that I will be back to thinking clearly and optimistically again
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