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How to Trade Your Teen’s Lies for Trust

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additudemag.com

Q: My teen with ADHD habitually lies, and it worries me. How can I stop this behavior?Poor impulse control can cause teens with ADHS to make poor choices – and lie about those choices.

Lying stems from avoidance, denial, or a desire to skirt punishment.But lying compounds the problem. There’s the lie, and then there’s the original problem that caused the lie.There is something called earned trust.

Through their actions, children and adolescents build on or destroy what has accumulated in a “trust bank account” with their parents.

Kids think their trust bank accounts are flush with cash just because they exist. That’s not the case. Trust is earned. When a parent loses trust because a child lied, the child must earn it back, perhaps by complying with agreements or behaviors you both negotiated, for example.When younger kids with ADHD lie, it doesn’t typically mean they’re trying to deceive you.

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