“I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage.” – Erma Bombeck“After a good dinner, one can forgive anybody, even one’s own relations.” – Oscar Wilde“Thanksgiving is a magical time of year when families across the country join together to raise America’s obesity statistics.” – Stephen Colbert“Thanksgiving, man.
Not a good day to be my pants.” – Kevin James“If you stand in the meat section at the grocery store long enough, you start to get mad at turkeys.
There’s turkey ham, turkey bologna, turkey pastrami. Someone needs to tell the turkey, ‘Man, just be yourself.'” – Mitch Hedberg“I’m from Canada, so Thanksgiving to me is just Thursday with more food.
And I’m thankful for that.” – Howie Mandel“Thanksgiving … that is all about overeating. One of the main dishes is actually called ‘stuffing.’ Stuffing?